Book Three

Hector tells his brother “Oh just get out of my sight,
This war is all your fault and now you’re too afraid to fight!”
Paris, feeling guilty, does admit that’s only fair
“I’ll take on Menelaus in single combat, I don’t care,
Whoever wins keeps Helen, while the loser will be dead
The rest of you won’t need to fight and can be friends instead.”
The challenge is accepted, but Menelaus is strong
Although his weapons break he’ll surely win before too long
There’s no chance feeble Paris can still triumph in this bout
So Aphrodite intervenes and spirits Paris out
The Greeks think this is cheating, Agamemnon bellows “Hey!”
While Helen asks her lover “What happened? Are you OK?”
Paris says “I am now, though I almost wound up dead
It really turned me on though. Come on, let’s go to bed.”